Megatron/Optimus Prime

In the beginning, before there was war, before there was peace, there was Megatron/Prime. They take some sort of record for the worst break-up of the era. However, they seem to have gotten hooked back up together! (Chains are only involved sometimes.) You have not truly entered Cracktran as a mech until you have said some variant of "EW. Gross! TMI!"

• Thundercracker/Prime/Megatron

Really recent. Turns out the leaders are into threesomes.

Barricade/Arcee

Happened after Barricade rescued her from the rubble of the Golden Gate Bridge, though there had been interest many years ago in the middle of the war, as Arcee was the only Autobot Barricade encountered during the war he didn't kill. By and by they went through a lot together, their bond was finally broken by Nemesis. Thanks a lot, Nemmykins! >/

Blackout/Bonecrusher

Drunken one-night stands FTW! Something about 'stripping' and 'table-dancing' that we're not supposed to talk about. I hear Swindle has videos. Despite their mutual hatred and bickering, the one night stand seems to have gone on for... ...how long now? A while. Bonecrusher admits he doesn't hate Blackout as much as everyone else, and that's good enough.  For the love of Primus the divine Creator they AIN'T BONDED, DAMN IT.

Blackout's Left Hand -> Megatron's Aft

Somehow the two became fused together while at the bottom of the trench. Blackout refuses to talk about it anymore. We all know it was deliberate, Blackout, you can tell us.

Blaster/Sunstorm

This pairing happened at a rave, because Sunstorm's got the moves to match Blasters, and Blaster likes curling up to something warm at night. XD Seriously, they have a deep seated devotion for the other, and despite subsequent attacks on the Spymaster, and random kidnappings of Sunstorm- they've managed to keep a strong bond between the two, as they are indeed bonded. Raindance, one of Blaster's cassettes is quite protective of Sunstorm, while Steeljaw isn't so... But no kid like a stepmom so quick yet, ne?

It's dead now. Blaster got amnesia and wasn't doing anything to reconstruct it, so Sunstorm broke the bond.

Bombshell/Moonracer

This is the most WTF pairing in Cracktran. Moonracer's complete and total obliviousness (or is it really?) eventually brought them together. Her constant badgering to be his friend eventually paid off in the end, 'cause now they're the wackiest pairing out there.

Elita-1/Soundwave/Brawl

The threesome that isn't actually a threesome. (We usually call this a triangle.)

• Elita-1/Soundwave

Elita, rebounding off of Prime and Megatron being attached at the hip, got considerably drunk with Soundwave. The two hit it off, and Elita bravely took on the responsibility of co-parenting the Cassettes. (They didn't take that well. At one point, Buzzsaw and Ravage planned her inevitable destruction. Soundwave was Not Amused.) Elita seems to have a high tolerance for bad treatment, as she keeps forgiving Soundwave for everything he does.

• Soundwave/Brawl

Old drinking buddies that had a drunken one night stand. Their love depends on large amounts of high grade and heavily encrypted private messages. They are currently newly bonded. Let's see if it survives sobriety. It will probably not last long due to Elita killing the both of them when she comes back.

This has been killed by Bombshell, as revenge for Soundwave adjusting Moonracer's behaviour.

Arcee/Elita

This was an ancient bond (approximately several million years old) that was recently shattered by Nemesis (along with Arcee's bond to Barricade); neither Elita nor Arcee took this well.

Fallen/Vector Prime

To paraphrase Vector - Fallen is a bitch and that's all you need to know. Fallen probably has a different story.

Genki/Nemesis

THEIR LOVE IS SO BINARY. and also shoujo.  NEMESIS-KUN~~~~ AISHITERU DESU YO~~~!!! :D :D :D :D <3 <3

Non-exist now, it seems.

Getsuei/Sunstreaker

Sunny isn't quite sure how this happened, but he blames tequila.

Non-existant as well.

Ironhide/Ratchet

They're like the old couple that's been married for practically all their lives.  Except, you know, they've only been together for two months.   It started when Ratchet helped a very drunk Ironhide back to Will's farm one night, and...yeah.  If they're in the same room, they can usually be found being all snuggly and cuddly.

Jazz/Prowl

Jazz, being the whore jerk kind fellow that he is, dropped Bumblebee like a sack of potatoes politely broke it off lil' Bee (whom he had been seeing during the time spent searching for the Allspark,) when Prowl finally arrived on earth early on in the game.  Since then, Jazz has finally become a bit more committed - he and Prowl finally moved in together, but have yet to bond.  Since then, Jazz and Prowl have gone though a few rough patches, more noticeably when Prowl was infected by the S7 virus and became a cold-fish the entire week he was taken over.  (Jazz was traumatized by the event - he likened it to "banging a wall" and feared deeply for the loss of his sexual mojo.) Thankfully, with the intervention of "Saint Jazz" and his convent powers of healing molestation, Prowl was saved and Jazz could get laid properly once more.

Sideswipe/Ducks

It's been discovered by a Ceiling Unicron one night that Sideswipe just absolutely loves Ducks. He might deny it, but that's just because ducks are his not so secret fetish.

• Sideswipe/Frogs

Just as Sideswipe has a love for Ducks, he also just can't get enough of those frogs.

• Sideswipe/Cows

Apparently, Sideswipe can't get enough, and has moved on to cows.

Sideswipe/First Aid

It all started with them taking a walk, and then getting drunk, which prompted First Aid to cuddle with Sideswipe and generally be adorable.  That evolved into a game of twenty questions later on, in which First Aid had a spazz attack and Sideswipe learned a decent bit about him and then decided it would be prudent to kiss him.  That evolved into them making out later on, and now they're very cuddly, and snuggly, and they scare Blackout.

Sixshot/Runabout

Something about a dance lesson gone horribly, horribly awry led to an accidental bonding between Sixshot and Runabout. They seem to have taken it well: Sixshot threatens bodily harm to anyone who so much as looks at Runabout funny, and Runabout sends obscene material to Sixshot during missions.

Skyfire/Starscream

It was inevitable that this would happen. Starscream still thinks he's the top; Skyfire lets him. You can laugh at him if you want! (They maintain that they have had the most wildly inventive sex of any mech on the base, invented the Mile High Club, and all sorts of other things. "Interstellar travel takes a long, long time," as Starscream puts it.)

• Starscream/Spatula/Skyfire

Starscream loves his spatula. Loves it as much as Skyfire, actually. Skyfire is NOT AMUSED. Skyfire is tempted to commit ice-seppuku every time that damn spatula comes up in conversation. DO NOT MENTION THE SPATULA. 

(This is a chat convention, after Starscream's player exulted over her spatula one too many times (aka once). Not actually in-game. Despite it looking like it. We break the fourth wall gud.)

Skywarp/Fireflight

Relatively new, but Fireflight is utterly dedicated to his mate and they're happy. Go figure. Rendered null when Warp lost all of his memories of Flight. It's made things awkward between them.

Firestar/Chromia

The only Femme-slash in the game, these two aren't exactly shy about when and where they do it, and are often not afraid to put on a show for others, and this includes dancing. Lots of dancing.

Thunderblast/Shockwave

The pairing that will never be, much to Thunderblast's dismay.

Thundercracker's Quantum Mate Theory

Corrected, for great justice.

There's a nice little family being built up around Thundercracker. It started out as just Thundercracker and Skywarp, then Bee decided he wanted a piece of Seeker aft. After that, Fireflight showed up and bonded with Skywarp, although he also really likes TC, so we'll see how that works out. Anyway, point is TC gets a lot of action. Bastard.

Skydive/Bluestreak

They're bonded, but Bluestreak has memory problems. They're working on it though, mostly with lots of sex - go figure. They are probably the sappiest pair in the game at the moment. I mean really sappy. Sappy enough to be mistaken for maple trees.

Jeff/Arcee

Another pair that will never be, but he's still trying, silly bastard.

Spinger/Arcee

A new pairing, Springer and Arcee recently bonded after her (second!) rescue from Nemesis. It's been all fluffy bunnies and butterflies so far! Course, Barricade's pretty pissed. We'll see how this goes!